Hello. I know i'm late but i'm still gonna say it so HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!! I got same old azam this year too. My azam is to lose some weight i guess. Whatever. Wow its 2015 already and infact its mid february already. Hahahahah and 3rd march. Hahahahahahahahhahaihate3rdmarchhahahahaahahahaha. Ignore that.

Actually i'm nervous thinking about the result. What if I got G on some subject? what if i got no A's at all? Ya Allah i'm nervous and worries about all this. but actually i dont even want to talk about this. So lets put this aside first.

So yesterday, i went to ioi city mall putrajaya with my families. Then we went into nike shop looking for some sneakers. then i was rooming around outside the shop after all of us got out from the shop. Suddenly, my sister called me and she said she saw someone exactly look alike him. but i dont believe her cause i thought she want to put some joke on me. Then she told me she wasnt joking and she said ' i saw him. With the name of Allah SWT'. Okay i was shocked and dumbfounded at the same time. and many things crossed my mind like 'what he's doing there?' And 'why hes' working there?' Plus 'why i didnt saw him first?' Hahaha.

Then i ask my cousin to cross infront of the shop once again. Bamm i saw him but only from side. I think he saw me first and he look like he's trying to avoid me, i dont know. That time i was thinking 'if you avoiding me, why would you? Its not like i'm gonna kill you'. then i was looking at him from afar, suddenly he turned around and he saw me i guess, then i'm immediately left the scene and i was laughing out loud. I was laughing cause i was too shocked, amazed with kerja Allah and amazed bcs of this kebetulan. lucky i dont feel anything anymore when i saw. I dont feel happy nor sad or mad. Nothing. It just like bumped into stranger. okay end of this story.


So now, why i'm updating my blog is because somehow i feel sad today. Like really sad. And all i want is to cry. But i got no reason to be sad or crying at all. Plus even i feel all those feelings, my heart is empty. I feel nothing. But i'm sad and i'm still holding back my tears for no reason. nothing bad happen around me at all. Or is a sign that something gonna happen later? Or that bcs i was thinking so much about it?Haih whatever. feeling empty is probably the most horrible feeling ever i think. Cause everything you did, you feeling nothing. i'm like a living death-body. I hate that. And now, i'm not really interested in relationship. Even i said i want to hav a boyfie too or whatever, but still, i'm not interested for now. being a friend, probably yes. Relay is a big NO. and you want to know what is the most horrible feeling? when you need someone to share your concern, but noone seems actually care about you. Yeah that kind of feeling. You guys wanna know why is it hard for me to open up my prob to other ppl, cause whenever i try to open up, they acting like they dont care and they're not interested to know or they not concern at all. That's what makes me so guarded. that is why i decided to keep all my probs and concern all by myself. and solve it myself. With Allah guide, i'm still standing strong and live like other ppl. I keep on telling myself 'I'm okay. I'm gonna be okay. I will be okay'. Always. Even i'n not expecting so much but I know something good gonna happen soon. InShaaAllah. 😘😘

OLD ϟ NEW